Powerful Answers On Infidelity And The Church by Rev. Christie Bature: MP3 Download & Sermon Notes

How the church fails the hurting party

When one spouse commits adultery, the church invalidates the pain of the one who was hurt, then pressures them to keep the marriage together. Nothing is asked of the one who broke the vows. No counseling, no rehab, no restitution, no boundaries, no accountability. He is left free to walk out to the next person, while the victim is told to fix what they didn't break.

The story of the anointed man and the standard for leaders

Pastor Ezekiel Atang of God's House of Refuge, Uyo, once had a gifted, anointed man in his church whose sexual depravity disturbed his soul. People told him to kick the man out. He refused, pointing to Romans 7, Paul's picture of the believer caught in a conflict he is struggling against.

But knowing there is a problem is not the same as doing nothing about it. If you've been in the church for five months, God's soap should have washed you by now, the soap and water are available, so where are you standing that it isn't reaching you?

The man was sent into a recovery program, broke, and surrendered to God. He now runs one of the most vibrant ministries reaching sex addicts, having rescued more than 500 people from sexual addiction, a ministry that has grown across many churches beyond God's House of Refuge.

He should be accountable. The standard is higher for the man of God than for the man on the pew.

A personal story: driven out of church

When infidelity struck her own family, the church's first reaction was to drive them out. They were left churchless for months, without spiritual covering, thrown away because the church didn't want the shame.

Two men of God, both now deceased, stood by the family instead: Reverend Abel Tarriah of the Redeemed Christian Church of God, King's Palace, and Reverend Donald Peterside of God's Gospel Mission Tabernacle. They kept coming to the house, checking in, praying. Abel Tarriah personally took her husband to a recovery program for six weeks. Those two men made sure the family remained in the faith.

Church is for dirty people

The church has to stop trying to be politically correct and simply care about people. Suspend the one who did wrong if you must, but ask how you can help him too, that is ministry.